G'day from our rattletrap house,
Have you read any good books lately?Any books at all? Books and reading have made a triumphant & appreciated return to my life in the past few months. Roddy Doyle's "The Van", his "The Woman who Walked into Doors," Christos Tsiolkas' "The Slap," Robert Drewe's "Our Sunshine," and this morning I'm into Richard Ford's "Independence Day."
I've been alongside a couple of Dubiner's setting up a chipper van outside a pub. I've been witness to horrible physical abuse. I've pondered life from the perspectives of a teenage girl, a septuagenarian Greek man and egotistical men suffering mid-life crises. I've ridden with a widow's son outlawed whose requests Must Be Obeyed.
And it's been grand.
The pace of life has slowed here in the past months. Maybe this is due to my new job – I'm certainly not bringing any work home any more. We all feel that like a cold change across the bay on a day of stifling heat. And I'm attending a workplace only 3 days each week; giving me the rare gift of being at work more than I'm not (3 outta 5 days) while also being at home more than I'm not (4 outta 7 days). Presto! What a trick!
Breathing space is noticeable around our place. Unexpected contacts & visits! from long-ago friends have burnt a warm & welcome dizziness. Special to think & to remember & to share. To clap eyes on & embrace & embrace the history & the shared experiences worth more than you can say.
Breathing space.
Running. Running for the sake of running has always perplexed me. Laps of the oval? Something for the greyhounds, mate. But this week I've gone 25km (total) in four runs & am feeling really good for it – if a bit tight around the calves. It's a kind of tiredness that I'd forgotten about. That tiredness that says "yep, you've done a physically tough thing today."
Breathing space.
Stephanie turned 3 in October. Family lunch at our place. She is full of questions and full of opinions. She reasons and rationalises and explains. She remembers. Her standard position is the contrary one. "Steph, would you like the blue or the red bowl?" "No, the yellow bowl." She reads (memorises) her books with an uncannily accurate and fast ability. And she will then sit with Kyla and read them to her. Stephanie loves jig-saw puzzles. And she will help Kyla with puzzles, too. On Wednesday Stephanie drew a picture and wrote the letter M at the top, saying "This is M for Mummy and I'm going to give this picture to her." She takes herself to the toilet now – calling for help when a bum wipe is required. She has started riding her bike (birthday present – with training wheels). She regularly rides to the park now ("Dad, you and Kyla can walk behind me.")
Stephanie knows and remembers. She places people and events better than anyone I know. Meeting up with friends last week she stood in the centre of the gathering & gave a rollcall of attendees, matching couples together as "best friends" ("There's Jack. And over there is Amy. Jack and Amy are best friends.") She can recall events and places of a similar gathering months ago. I find it extraordinary.
Stephanie runs and jumps and slides and does it all with a fair bit of caution. When meeting someone new or going to a new place, Stephanie's retreat for comfort manifests in a kind of baby language – she mimics Kyla's language. For a while that confused us, even annoyed us a bit, but we realised it's just her security net and that she soon warms out of it. She relates to other people well, I think, after the initial feeling-out period. We are fortunate to have close contact with friends and their kids. Fortunate to watch skills learnt from 4-year-olds put straight into practice (You mean I can walk up a slide backwards? Why didn't anybody say so?)
Kyla is about 20 months old now. She is a funny girl who has a sneaky and crafty way of giving you a side-ways glance before making a joke. She is energetic and bold. She is a cuddly huggy girl who loves contact. Kyla slides and runs and screams and pushes trolleys and trains and prams around and around our rattletrap house. Her language is incredible ("Dad, Stephanie has enormous cup, doesn't she Dad? E-nor-mous!") I'm certain that she enjoys the benefit of an older sibling to play with & learn from. Though they have their disagreements (Me: "Steph, Kyla can use those bells in two minutes when you have finished." Steph: "No, she certainly can NOT"), the constant policing of a few months ago has ceased. Squabbles occur less frequently now. Maybe Kyla's language has developed enough to enable clearer communication. Who knows?
Kyla tries things. Climbs. Picks herself straight up when she invariably falls. Stands on top of the tricycle seat and throws her head back, arms out wide. Grins. Trying to placate her writhing wriggling squirminess is like trying to harness a fiery young filly.
Days at home are wonderful. There was a time when the prospect of spending a day at home caused anxiety to rise like a water spout. Nowadays anxiety has dropped to virtually nil.
Other happenings?
With Justine's help (thanks Juz!) CJ has introduced a Sunday night Muppets night at our place. After a bath we all catch an episode of the Muppets on DVD. What a treat.
And CJ & I got away for 2 nights recently – without the kids. Shock! They had a holiday (and a terrific time) at Grandma & Grandpa's house. We had a holiday (and a terrific time) at Airey's Inlet with mates. Extremely restful in a way we haven't really known in years. Talking about it, we reckon that rest came with the complete absence of decisions to be made. Instead we could just BE. We've got a family holiday lined up soon. Looking forward to it very much.
All is well at our place. Hectic activity & uncontrollable screaming spins out-of-control a couple of times a day but this is the natural order of things & something to be cherished. The kids begin their first experience of childcare (1 day/week) in a fortnight from now. No doubt there will be tremors. And so life continues to be entirely about our relationships with other people. Go well.
