Winter in Melbourne with gloves on hands for the ride to work and Jack Frost’s work on display through the Edinburgh Gardens this morning. Lunar eclipse last night. Winter solstice next week. We are little organisms down here, that’s for sure. The lack of sunlight usually affects moods, I reckon. Something I’ve been watching a bit. Something others have spent their lives researching. But coming into the solstice this year, I’m picking up on a fair bit of gloom about the place. It’s mainly at my workplace, though, to be fair. Everything else is sailing along under full spinnaker.
Work is somewhere I don’t want to go, these days. That’s not so good now, is it? I suppose it’s all temporary, as the Buddhists and as the Lunar eclipse would attest. But spending time amongst those who feel downtrodden is not a happy time. Unless you are the Bringer of Meaningful Relief. That ain’t me, babe, no no no that ain’t me babe, that ain’t me you’re lookin’ for babe.
So I’m thinking a lot about that little pearl. For how long do you hang on in an unhealthy environment? What are the relative merits of a stable job with ongoing status and superannuation versus obvious daily gloom and mental anguish? Do you wait out the bad patch? How long does a bad patch last? When do you declare the bad patch to be not just a bad patch but a bad entrenched culture? How Much Is Enough?
At times like this it’s good to go for a walk. Or a bike ride. This week I’ve experimented with 3 different routes to and from work. The first is my old tried & true. It’s the whole length of the Canning Street bike highway through North Carlton to the Exhibition building. I take in the old terrace houses of Carlton, the glory of the World Heritage Royal Exhibition building, but then I run the gauntlet of LaTrobe Street in peak hour – hook turns, trams, delivery vans, pedestrians and headphones. It’s high drama, down to the docklands footy ground and then across to work.
Second is the Moonee Ponds Creek bike track. Very safe, as the whole LaTrobe St mania is forgone, but in its stead is a relentless panorama of concrete, shadows, steel, shadows, barbed wire, shadows, urban drain, shadows and the underside of the citylink toll road. There is a wide open stretch of wide open parkland up around the zoo, but the overwhelming feeling is one of claustrophobia and urban decay.
Third, the longest but my favourite. Cut along Park Street and into the Edinburgh Gardens, cross the road near the Fitzroy Pool and then take the length of Napier street. Little Fitzroy cottages, the Rose, the Napier, the Fitzroy Town Hall. Cross again and skirt two sides of the Fitzroy Gardens, hammering down down down the hill to the MCG, past the enormous D K Lillee in his delivery stride and up & over & into Birrarung Marr. Along the Yarra all the way to Spencer St and then cut into work.
Working only three days/week is great for me presently. CJ is doing the same. Steph “I Love school dad” is going great guns in prep. The 3 Rs are flourishing, but so is her sense of self “I’ll have one plait and one pony today thanks, Dad.” Kyla “I did this painting for you Dad – see it’s all orange and that’s your favourite colour” is well at home at kinder. We enter the kinder and about 4 other girls stop what they’re doing and come to greet her.
Knowing that our kids have their own worlds is brilliant. Other kids who I’ve never met say g’day to ours in the school yard. I went with Steph’s class on a research trip to CERES the other day. They were going as scientists to research what kinds of things are in a market and in a café. They intend to build a café and market in their classroom. The kids had clipboards, pencils and were encouraged to record their observations. Brilliant. Picking up Kyla from kinder not long afterwards, “I don’t want to go yet, Dad. Can I fill this cup?” was great. She was climbing up a frame to grab berries from a tree. Four girls all collecting berries together to mix with the sand and thereby create magic dust. That’s the stuff.
So time at home is great. Still sticking with the weeknight vegetarian plan. Feeling good for it. Had the outside of the house painted just now. It’s come up well, too. Otherwise, I’m looking forward to the school holidays and to a couple of adventures. We’ve been planning a group holiday to the Prom in early January. That prospect is a ripper. We’ll have the following week doing more group camping down at Cumberland river. It’s looking great.
So while work is dreary and not rewarding, the approach I’m taking is this: work is not my life. I work only 3 days per week. The rest of the time I’m up & about and the work lets me do this. It’s means-to-an-end stuff.
Next time you see me, who knows how it will be going? There are plenty of people worse off than me – I’m going fine. So fine that I bought myself a new hat, in fact. The hat that the kids call my “handsome hat”. I think of a book when I wear it, by Mem Fox, called The Magic Hat. The first line is: “One fine day, from out of town, and without any warning at all, there appeared a magic hat…” A good read. Steph &Kyla both recount this bit just now: “Oh the magic hat, the magic hat, it moved like this, it moved like that, it spun through the air for a mile and half, onto the head of a lofty giraffe.”
Best book read recently? Apart from The Magic Hat. That Deadman Dance by Kim Scott. Set around Albany at the time of first European contact. A great story of relationships and consequence and had me thinking about what might have been. If only. Really good.
Really good having the First Wednesday crew. We six fine gentlemen have been meeting up for a yarn on the first Wednesday of the month for a few years now. Gee. Some really open and brilliant and tricky and challenging conversations over the time. The recent introduction of guitars to the night gave a new dimension to things. We’ll see how that pans out. Though I’m really excited to be pursuing that guitar/ music/ creativity angle with a very good and supportive friend now.
Had my grandpa’s 91st birthday last month and while I dressed up as him for the day (shirt and tie, hair slicked over with Bryl cream), I liked the look so much I’ve taken it up semi-permanently. A bit WW2, a bit Mad Men. I find it interesting that some people seem to have a fixed image of themselves that doesn’t change year after year after year, but others grow beards, shave them off, dye their hair, grow it, cut it, re-style left, right & centre. We little organisms are interesting, aren’t we?
CJ is at a kinder committee meeting as I write this. The kids are now in bed. Tomorrow is a Friday and that’s the day we both work. CJ will ride into work early tomorrow & I’ll do the rustling so we’re at school by 8.45 and kinder by 9ish. I’ll hop the #96 tram and be at work between 9.30 and 10. CJ will knock off work ~3 to do the pick ups and I’ll drift home a bit later. That’s our dance on a Friday. It’s working really well.
I’ll finish with music – loving the Avett Brothers (thanks Chambo) and Gareth Liddiard (thanks Rocky). Just tonight though, it’s the Barrett’s Privateers, that grabbed me a fortnight ago on the Weddos live double album. Will go great around the next camp fire I’m at. Reckon I’ve got the lyrics sorted.
“Oh the year was 1778, how I wish I was in Sherbrooke now…”
